Domestic violence isn’t simple. It’s a manipulative process the abuser uses to keep the victim in the relationship while maintaining power and control. It is the false portrayal of intense love to get what they want, which is ultimately control over another individual.
The power and control wheel demonstrates how an abusive relationship can look, and some of the things an abusive person does or says to get what they want.
Common Warning Signs of Abuse
Domestic violence doesn’t look the same in every relationship because every relationship is different. But one thing most abusive relationships have in common is that the abusive partner does whatever it takes to gain power and control over their partner.
While there is no stereotype as to what an abuser may look like on the outside, there are a few common traits that you can look out for. Some of the signs of an abusive relationship include a partner who:
- Tells you that you can never do anything right
- Shows extreme jealousy of your friends and time spent away
- Keeps you or discourages you from seeing friends or family members
- Insults, demeans or shames you with put-downs
- Controls every penny spent in the household
- Takes your money or refuses to give you money for necessary expenses
- Looks at you or acts in ways that scare you
- Controls who you see, where you go, or what you do
- Prevents you from making your own decisions
- Tells you that you are a bad parent or threatens to harm or take away your children
- Prevents you from working or attending school
- Destroys your property or threatens to hurt or kill your pets
- Intimidates you with guns, knives or other weapons
- Pressures you to have sex when you don’t want to or do things sexually you’re not comfortable with
- Pressures you to use drugs or alcohol
To learn more about warning signs of domestic violence and the different types of abuse, click here.